Are you looking to be saved? Do you have a scenario a dream that involves being “rescued”. Is there a Knight on a white horse who charges in to save the damsel in distress? Is there a Goddess who shines her beauty on you and all is transformed? Are you waiting for that lottery ticket to come in? Are you waiting for that bolt of lighting from above that shall be the word of God come to save you?
If so- even if a small part of you says yes I have felt these things I have thought this way then there is a part of you that is hoping to be saved. And that is the biggest obstacle to coming into authentic empowerment.
Do you go to see your healer/therapist hoping they will make it all better for you? Do you have expectations that involve you doing very little work? Have you developed a practice of meditation or yoga and believe that the salvation will come through a yoga pose, a specific mantra? Have you gone and sat with the land sat with a tree and believed that in itself would transform your life. Have you sat in front of alters and lit candles and believed that act in itself would save you?
For the answer is yes- all of the above could “save” you. And it could also not. For when we see we do not need saving, when we see that we are the saviours we are seeking in healers, teachers, in mantras and yoga poses- we start to realise that the salvation we seek is not something imposed on us. It lies in us and all these methods- the teacher, the healer, the mantra are ways of uncovering the very best healer you could ever meet- yourself- that Divine part of you that is infinitely wise and powerful.
When we seek to be saved, when we ask our healers and teachers to hold us we have forgotten that the greatest empowerment comes from walking our path alone. Our guides walk on their own paths and sometimes they walk alongside us- they do not walk the path for us and they do not take us by the hand and lead us.
Time and again I see the same scenarios play out in healings- so often in fact I believe it is our greatest sickness- this need and sometimes this fervent belief that we shall be saved, that we are nothing till a “guru” or someone comes and saves us. Whether it is the tall dark handsome stranger fantasy we are fed. The one that goes we never really could open up to intimacy, we were always afraid to love, we didnt love our bodies, we lived in our heads, we were lonely and all career focused and then along came this man- along came this knight who totally changed our lives. He showed us how to love and because he loved us so much we started to love ourselves. Because he worshipped our body we started to also. Because he was care free and a bit of a rebel we started to be the same also. Or exchange this tale for: we were off the rails, we were a disaster on legs and along came this man and he was so organised and practical he showed us how to cook a decent meal, he helped us pay our bills and suddenly we stopped the partying ways and we found the love for self again. For after all these scenarios have one thing in common the lack of honouring and love of self. And not in the loose way that excuses resistance to change, not the honouring that chooses to attack others and then call it speaking one’s Truth. The Truth is Love and does not seek to attack others- it has no need.
So this lack of self love is in the fantasy healed by the other. And this fantasy plays out with both sexes. You were the lonely man, closed off from the world, had your heart broken, never wanted to love again, been let down by women, no time to care for yourself, busy with work, busy with helping others and not yourself, healing from an injury, healing from a broken heart and along came this Goddess. She saved you. Intimacy with her brought you home because your heart opened again and you learned that all that had been missing was the company of a good woman.
That is not to say that Love in our lives does not heal us in some way. We are here to build community and family in many ways. The point being these fantasies are about a lack of self love.And we see these fantasies played out in film after book after song. We are fed this is what being saved is. The truth is that we do this work ourselves. We come to honour and love ourselves, by ourselves- that is true salvation. We come to do this because we see we are a reflection of the Divine. We see that we are the Goddess and the Knight. We are the saviours we have been wishing for. And when we unite the male and female in us, when we bring home those polarities in us we start that saving process by ourselves for ourselves.
Do you wish to sit at the feet of a guru and so find enlightenment. I have actually had people ask me to be their guru because somehow they feel being around me shall help them to ascend or reach some nirvana? How is that even possible? We house these in us and all anyone else does is guide us perhaps. No one else, I repeat this, no one else takes us anywhere we have not already been or are not already heading towards anyway. We choose the life we lead consciously or not so. And if the wounded child in us, the unexplored shadow aspects we refuse to acknowledge and love are busy choosing our lives for us we shall have lives we feel need saving. When we come to Love all parts of ourselves there can be no seeking to be saved.
Do you believe a healer shall take it all away. Shall give you that key meditation, that key healing that shall save you. Even the most profound healing shall need your involvement. In Shamanic Healing when profound soul retrieval work takes place there is almost always a ritual for the person to complete in their own lives to honour this healing. Should the ritual not be done the healing no longer works, the healing does not last. I cannot tell you the number of times I have witnessed incredible healings for people. Months later they are complaining that the good feeling from the healing has not lasted. Why? the rituals were not honoured. Why? Because there was something that got in the way, it was too hard to do….something. That basically says I place the responsibility for my healing on someone else. They shall save me. The rituals in a Shamanic Healing are about the person who sought the healing firmly integrating the healing. In traditional communities should that person come back to the Shaman and complain the healing has not worked- they shall be asked- have you done the rituals and if not- they shall be sent away. There shall be no hand holding and hugging to console them. It is that simple- do the work for one’s healing and if you do not do the work then live with the consequences.
The seeking of saving has become a disease of our age. It is a myth that some flower essence or crystal shall save you. It is a myth some workshop or book shall save you. Until we come to realise these are only tools we shall be forever lost in a world of fantasy and disconnected from our own inner healer. Yes seek healers and teachers who can assist you and know its a co creation. Should you go see a doctor and complain of an infection- you may be given some medicine to take. Should you omit to take the medicine and the infection worsen and worsen who would you seek to blame for this? The medicine, the doctor or that part of you that did not do what was healing for yourself. Should you need glasses to see distances and you insist on not wearing them. And then wait and wait for someone to save you, help you to cross the road, help you to catch a bus- you may be waiting a long time. When the remedy lay in your grasp the whole time.
Yes there are those teachers and healers that shall feed this disempowerment in many. And tell others without this book or that essence they would be lost. Should we choose to stay with such healers and teachers again it is us that must bear the responsibility for this. No one said the path to self realisation would be easy. It may be for some and it may not be for others.
Its a myth that we shall all come to know the Divine and our deepest selves by standing in a field clapping and holding hands. We come to know our Divinity by seeking to heal and understand our stories, our pasts, our shadow aspects, by coming to know the inner child, by coming to know all aspects of ourselves. The part that wants to stand in a field clapping and the part that doesn’t. That is when we find the Midpoint in our Selves. The Middle Way. And when we stop seeking and yearning for saving. When we stop looking to others for ALL the answers is when we come to know our Divinity. When we honour the sacred every day in a committed and authentic way.
We live in an age of much information readily available. How often do you do your own research or do you expect someone else to give you the answers? I once had someone email me to ask me what a Chakra was, how did it work, how to cleanse it, how to charge it…a long list of questions from a complete stranger to me- another stranger, they knew nothing about. When a small amount of time doing the research would have yielded so much more. And been so much more empowering. Why do we feel someone else has the answers to our life’s questions. If I dont know what to have for my dinner, do I go out onto the street and ask a total stranger what I should have or do I sit with myself and ask what do I want to have for dinner and see what answer comes to me? If I don’t then have the ingredients for the meal do I sit on the street and start asking people to give me some of the ingredients- that could take me a very long time. Or do I go out and get the ingredients myself for my meal.
Until we go within and start to see that we wish to be saved we shall forever be undermining those opportunities that show up to empower us and heal us. Instead saying we are waiting to be saved. The old tale of the drowning man in the sea. His boat crushed by the waves, starts praying that God should help him and save him. Another boat comes along and offers him help, no he shouts from the sea I don’t need you God shall save me. The boat leaves. A while later the man is still struggling in the water, cold and hungry now and still praying for God to save him. A boat comes along, this time bigger and with food on board, no says the man Im waiting for God to save me. The boat leaves. The man is now very tired and very cold he is losing hope. He starts crying God why wont you save me, Im a good man, I give to charity, I have never cheated or lied, why wont you save me. A while later a yacht comes along, its huge with a buffet on deck- the captain offers to help the man. No says the man, God shall save me. Are you that man? Saving very rarely comes the way we expect- however the helping hand is always there. When we lose the desire to be “saved”- we start to open up to the world around us and all it can offer us.
We come to know the world around us is us and so as we come to heal ourselves we come to bring harmony into the world. There are many paths to self healing, from seeking a healer, to seeking a teacher, to sitting with the land. None of these are attachments, these are ways to enter the inner pathways and libraries of our Selves, which are a reflection of the Divine. Until we see we house all that we shall ever need, we shall forever be seeking and waiting. And that is no life. That is a waiting room of an existence. So where would you like to be?
Walk in Beauty and Stay Blessed.
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