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Sky Shayne Innes
Come with me on a journey today. It is an inner journey to your Being. For those of you who have journeyed into being, you will know there is no journey at all. Really and truly, it is as simple as turning the light on. In that instant, the darkness disappears and all is revealed. You know, and this knowing is complete without question or definition.
As I write theses words, I know that you recognize what I am talking of. You recognize it deeply in your heart where the Truth is always known. I also know that in the very next moment, our minds click in with their endless commentary of questions and doubts. In an instant, the light disappears and we are back in the darkness.
The journey is through the darkness. The journey is always about the darkness for there is no journey in the light. In the light there is only pure awareness, a knowing of the Truth without a shadow of doubt or a question of any kind. The journey I invite you to join me on today is the journey through the darkness.
Do not be afraid. This is not the darkness of childhood where things go bump in the night. This is the darkness of ignorance. For ignorance darkens, like a fog blanketing and deadening the landscape. We know that beyond the fog there is light but until it lifts, we fumble around, feeling our way in a cloud of unknowing.
What is this ignorance; this cloud of unknowing? The short answer is: ego. I am using the term in its broadest context. Ego is the entire construct of who you think and feel yourself to be. It is the name you go by, the gender you have, and your nationality, how you relate to the people in your life, your fears, your preferences and your beliefs. The important point I want to make here is that your ego is not just the negative aspects of yourself. It is also those you regard as positive human characteristics. In other words, it is anything at all that defines you in time and space. These definitions all point to a degree of ignorance, some more so than others.
Recently I was working with a very sensitive and lovely young woman of 26 years who felt she was “disgusting”. She felt this way about herself particularly in situations of intimacy. She had learnt to feel this way through an early experience of sexual abuse from her much older brother. Until this experience she had worshipped her brother. To make sense of this very “disgusting” experience, she concluded that she must be disgusting. In this way she could keep loving him but at considerable expense to herself.
This is an example of the ignorance I am talking of. We learn about ourselves through the experiences we have. Combined with our DNA and nature, such experiences create the unique individuals that we are. After we journeyed together through the ignorance, this lovely young person came to know herself differently. With the passage of time she was able to enter into a relationship free of the disgusting sexual overtones. Here is the important point I am making: when she believed herself to be disgusting, this was clearly ignorance. I think we can all see how inaccurate and erroneous such a conclusion is.
However, even liberated from such negative points of view, there is still a degree of ignorance if we are identified in any form. It is a lesser degree but it is the trap if we stop there. After such healing, it is very tempting to stop there. But the journey is not over. The fog is less foggy but we are still not in the light.
I often invite you to ask the question, “Who am I?”
Many of us know that there is no answer to this question. If we do find an answer, we have merely found where we are identified. As a question that reveals the Truth, there is no better question. Ramana Maharshi called it the “fast track question”. Truly answered, the cloud of unknowing is instantly dissolved and the light revealed. I offer the suggestion that the journey is journeying with this question.
Psychologically, many of us have clear insight into our perceived limitations. We have journeyed through the many stories of our psyche: our inner child, our blocks and our karmic ties. We have looked at our conditioning from our families of origin to our enculturation. This journeying has served us well. Instead of beings of limitation we have become beings of possibility. This is showing up in pleasing ways. Our relationships are more loving, we care more for our beautiful planet and we care more for the other creatures on this beautiful planet and, even each other. Nonetheless, I think few would disagree that we have a fair way to go. Jesus said, “Love your neighbour as you do yourself.” Sometime our love for ourselves is not too loving and our neighbour bears the brunt of this.
Endeavouring to reach greater levels of insight, some of us have journeyed with our multidimensional selves. We have been guided by the celestial beings, the Masters, our healing guides and the joyous wisdom of the dolphins and whales. Many wondrous and timely lessons have been learnt through our receptivity to the ancient wisdom of other dimensions. Indeed, just to acknowledge and experience our multidimensional selves has created new and fresh opportunities for journeying toward the light. Profound insights into our vastness and complexity gently erode our petty identifications and limitations. With this comes a growing awareness of our infinite and eternal Self. Past lives stop being about ‘me and my story’ and become a reflection, only a small reflection, of the universal being that you truly are, the beloved One.
At this point in the journey, a most amazing discovery is made. With much of the fog evaporated and only misty swirls enhancing the vast multidimensional facets of your being, with little or no clear-cut experience of separation, the light reveals love. Free of identification comes the most intimate and exquisite experience of being. Each moment holds its own sweetness. Our bodies, our minds and emotions are discovered to be utterly sacred and divine. Each step of the journey towards the light is revealed to be its evolution. It stops being about getting there and becomes about cherishing each precious moment. The light is not the destination. The light is what it reveals – love.
We feel so swamped in darkness. As we experience ourselves in the dark, not only is there no light, there is no love. We feel lost and overlooked. In Truth, this is not possible. It is part of the ignorance, the erroneous thinking where somehow we can be separate from the light, from the One. The gift of awakening from the nightmare is not simply that we can see; we can see with the eyes of love. Fear disappears and the journey is recognized as being – your Being, the ground of all Being.
It is hard to write of love revealed in this way. It is so subtle and yet so delightful, so slight and yet so freeing. Imagine there is nothing to worry about ever, nothing to stress about or get anxious about, nothing to resist or chase after – not even the light. Imagine each day as if on holiday where whatever you do is as if play. No urgency, and deadlines are just a way of knowing when. Imagine waking up in the morning and feeling grateful for a day full of experiences – grateful for the water to brush your teeth with, the kiss you can give to your beloved and the sunshine, or rain, on this body that you are blessed to have. Imagine where nothing really matters but everything is so very, very special.
A dear friend sent me a PowerPoint presentation of the most appalling pictures of children suffering starvation and all the indignities that go hand in hand with such atrocities. I felt my alarmed heartbeat at the horror of it. Darkness swamped my being as I read of the photographer’s suicide three months after taking the photographs. I felt the pull of darkness into helplessness and hopelessness, my mind scrambling for some strategy, some solution and finding only our greed and fear that can make such situations possible.
I looked at that tiny, bony child and asked, “Who am I?” I took my mind to the photographer and asked, “Who am I?” I felt in my being the many incarnations of troubled death and despair.
I journeyed deeper and slowly the light appeared dissolving all stories and revealing the love, the wholeness, the Oneness. With love came the tears but not tears of sorrow. These were tears of compassion and gratitude; that finally we are awakening and moving into a dimension where such atrocities can no longer manifest; that our love will make such atrocities impossible.
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